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"And now like every great king to come before us we shall choose champions to fight in our stead while eating oversized turkey legs from a safe distance."
Richard

"My Cousin Izzy" is the seventh episode of Season 1. It aired alongside It's All in the Executions.

Plot[]

Thirty years ago, Galavant's father Arnold returns home, and discovers that his son is missing his armor. Galavant explains that the other boys took it, and Arnold tells him that he can't have any hurt feelings because heroes aren't allowed to have feelings because they interfere with getting the job done. He tells Galavant that one day his moment will come, but his wife interrupts his song. As Arnold goes to chop wood, he assures Young Galavant that his time will come... and to never get married.

Galavant draws a map of the castle and promises to make his father proud, and Isabella comes over to talk. However, the hero says that they'll talk once he's finished plotting their escape. Isabella's parents tell her that her cousin Harry is coming to rescue them and then Isabella will marry him as they've always planned. Isabella points out that Harry is ten years her junior but her parents insist. She goes over to tell Galavant that Harry is coming, but he tells her that he will save them.

The guards come in and interrupt Galavant as he sings about his moment coming, and take everyone up to the throne room. Madalena introduces them to Kingsley, her future husband and brother-in-law. Richard is as surprised as anyone at the news, and Kingsley suggests that they duel if he feels so strongly about it. The king accepts and immediately declares that they'll choose champions. However, Kingsley chooses Gareth before Richard can, and Gareth has no choice but to accept. When Richard asks who can fight with a sword, no one volunteers at first. However, Galavant grabs Gareth's sword and takes down the guards, but then drops the weapon and says that in return for the prisoners' freedom, he will fight for Richard. Richard accepts and Galavant tries to sing about his moment coming, but an irritated Kingsley chloroforms him unconscious and walks away.

Back in the dungeon, Isabella warns Galavant that her parents can't stand him, and wonders why he offered to help Richard. Madalena comes in to take Galavant and Isabella to the field of honor, and advises him to take her offer to become her boy toy. He refuses, and the guards take them away. On the field, Gareth is warming up and Richard is unhappy that he loses either way. If Gareth loses, he loses Gareth. If Gareth wins, Richard loses his kingdom. Meanwhile, Vincenzo takes a break from selling rat bits to apologize to Gwynne because their date didn't work out as planned. She doesn't want to learn his first name, afraid that she might become attached to him and then they'll both die. Vincenzo assures her that they'll be okay, but Gwynne points out that no matter who wins in the fights among the nobility, the servants always get it in the neck.

As Galavant arms himself, he tells Isabella that he can't let feelings get in the way of what he has to do. However, he assures her that if he could, she would be the one he'd have feelings for. Before Galavant can sing that his moment has come, a guard announces that an army is riding toward them. Richard calls out his soldiers and they confront the army... and discover that it belongs to Prince Harry, Isabella's child fiancé. Isabella explains that her parents arranged the marriage, and Galavant wonders when she was going to tell him about it. Rather than have Gareth fight, Richard announces that protocol requires that they have a pre-duel welcome feast.

Sid and Jester hear everyone cheering and assume that Galavant died. Sid asks the others for ideas and Jester distracts one of the guards with a magic trick so he can steal his door keys. All they have to do is get rid of the guards on watch, but the guards are called away for the pre-duel lunch.

Gwynne visits Vincenzo in the kitchen and suggests that there's a way out for them. She suggests that they poison all of the royals so there's no one left to kill them, and Vincenzo warms to the idea.

Madalena has Galavant brought to the great hall and grows irritated when he maintains a manly silence. She points out that his father did the same thing, and Galavant admits that sometimes she surprises him with her warmth. However, Madalena, quickly ruins the moment by screaming at someone for eating a Danish.

Sid follows Galavant's map, leading the others through the castle and ignoring the King and Queen when they say he's going the wrong way. The squire doesn't believe them, until they spot a guard up ahead and have to take a detour.

At the feast, Gareth has finally had enough and tells Richard that he has to act like a man rather than a king. Everyone starts coughing and gagging while Richard sneezes uncontrollably. Up above, Gwynne and Vincenzo watch, and he finally admits that he couldn't bring himself to murder anyone. Since he knows everyone's dietary preferences, he just served them food that they're allergic to so that they could watch them suffer. Gwynne is touched that Vincenzo is so warm-hearted and thanks him for showing that their lives aren't as bleak as she believed, and kisses him.

As Madalena heads for the bathroom, Sid charges in and tosses Galavant a sword. Galavant fights his way past the guards and advances on Richard... and then stabs Isabella's crab, sparing her digestive danger because she's allergic to crab. He apologizes and explains that his father was wrong. Harry, realizing that Isabella is in love with Galavant, decides to go home. Once he leaves, Isabella tells Galavant that he finally got his moment in the sun.

Furious at the sabotage, Kingsley grabs Vincenzo and prepares to execute him. Richard finally has enough and says that only he can execute Vincenzo. Kingsley dares his brother to do something about him, and Richard announces that he will fight his own duel. Satisfied, Kingsley says that he will still have Gareth as his champion. Madalena admiringly says that she's really turned on by Kingsley... and then runs back to the bathroom.

Cast[]

Main Cast[]

Guest Cast[]

Songs[]

Trivia[]

  • The original title of this episode was "Death After Brunch".
  • The title is a reference to the film My Cousin Vinny.

Gallery[]

Sources[]

  1. (Name change) http://www.thefutoncritic.com/listings/20150109abc04/
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